


Coffee and Curiosity

by Lesbian_Byleth



Category: Helltaker (Video Game)
Genre: Azazel eventually finds out she’s a raging lesbian, F/F, Repressed Feelings, Slow Burn, Will add more tags as I write chapters, it might be eventually though :eyes:, malina is a good friend, pandemonica is trans but it’s not a plot point, probably a slow burn, wlw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:54:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25926211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lesbian_Byleth/pseuds/Lesbian_Byleth
Summary: Pandemonica starts seeing angels. Or rather an angel.
Relationships: Azazel & Pandemonica, Azazel/Pandemonica
Comments: 11
Kudos: 106





	1. Pandemonica’s Thoughts

When Pandemonica first met her, she had a very strong feeling that she would hate Azazel. She was too... angelic. And as a demon, something or someone being ‘holy’ is usually enough to repel most of her kind under normal circumstances.

These were not normal circumstances. Her and her associates being plucked out of hell by a big burly man with black shades and a death wish was not normal. Even more so, being placed under the same roof as the rest of the group, eating meals together, and actually doing something other than pushing buttons on a keyboard all day, was downright  _alien_ to her. Nearly the whole overworld was alien to most of the crew. The sight of the open sky made her head spin whenever she turned her eyes upward, especially in the daytime when there were no stars for her to anchor herself to. It was a stark contrast to the rocky stalactites or ceiling tiles and fluorescent lights that she was so familiar with. As much as the overworld made her feel out of place, the coffee that humans make is leagues better than whatever stale brew she could ever hope to scrape together back home. God that coffee. So bold and refreshing it made her want to-

A burst of muffled barking and laughter came from the closed window across the table she was sitting at. What sounded like an exasperated ‘slow down!’ soon followed. She looked up from her coffee mug to see what all the noise was. From her position, she could only see a couple pairs of ears and two pointed tails over the window sill. A frisbee flew up and away from their position, and the barking continued as one of the ear-tail trios chased after the disc. The Cerberus triplets loved to play fetch so this wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for Pandemonica to see. A halo’d figure ran into view and started speaking to the remaining pair of ears.

_Azazel_...

They chatted back and forth for a while, Azazel furiously taking notes the whole time. Az paused and patted Cerberus on the head, then the ears bobbed off into the distance, tail in tow. She continued writing something for a couple moments, then looked up, noticing that she had an audience behind the glass. She smiled and waved excitedly, and quickly bounced out of Pan’s view, towards the door, which swung open a few moments later.

“I just made an amazing discovery!” She exclaimed as she made her way to the table.

“Mm?”

Azazel took a seat at the end of the table. “Would.. would you like to hear about it?”

“I guess there is no reason not to listen. What is it?”

Pandemonica didn’t mind the angels company, much to her initial surprise after coming topside. And as Azazel spoke on and on about the state of Cerberus’s consciousnesses, or rather  consciousness , as she found out, Pandemonica found herself getting somewhat engrossed in the conversation.

“So Cerberus is... one mind spread across the three of them?”

“Possibly! It could be that or it could be that there is one of the triplets that controls the other two. Or it could be something else entirely. I’d love to do more testing to find out.”

“This is... somehow fascinating to me.” Pan said, having realized how into it she had gotten. Then she smiled at the angel. “I’m actually very interested in hearing your conclusion on this.”

Azazel beamed at the demon “Thank you! I’d love to bounce ideas off you like this more often. You’re a great listener.”

“I’d like that...” She looked down at her mug of coffee and smiled some more. “Thank you, Azazel.”

Azazel got up from her seat and patted Pandemonica on the head, much like she did with Cerberus. “No, thank you, Monica.”

As the angel wandered off, Pan felt something... unusual and warm inside her chest. Instead of confronting it, she ignored it. She picked up her mug and took her first sip. She spat it back out immediately in slight disgust. Somehow enough time had passed that the coffee cooled off. Pandemonica snorted.

_Heh. Figures_.


	2. Azazel’s Fears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning: mention of violent homophobia, alcohol use
> 
> Azazel gets a breath of fresh air.

Azazel had been trying to fall asleep for hours, with not even the slightest success. She couldn’t relax. Her mind was overflowing with anxious thoughts and feelings that wouldn’t cease long enough for her to doze off. 

_This is too much for me._

She sighed and glanced over at her alarm clock. The red numbers stared back at her from her desk, steady and unblinking.

_03:48. Another sleepless night. What’s one more on the pile, I guess._

The air around her felt heavy and viscous, like an invisible sludge. She didn’t know if it was just her mind playing tricks, but she couldn’t stand it much longer. She needed fresh air.

Azazel sat up and threw her legs over the side of the bed. She took a moment to rub her eyes. Then she got up and made her way to the window. The cool moonlight flowing through the blinds was briefly interrupted by her grabbing the blinds’ bottom rail and shoving it upwards in a swift motion. She slid the window open and climbed out into the night. She felt the rough grit of the shingles beneath her feet and the warm summer night air on her face. She moved a few feet away from the window and carefully sat down. She took a deep breath and decided to try to organize her thoughts. She figured that perhaps a different environment would help her in that task.

Before Azazel joined the Helltaker’s ‘harem,’ life was a little bit more simple. She was a visitor from another world, her only two goals were ‘survive’ and ‘gather data on the local inhabitants.’ The first was easy. She was one of the best of the best in her organization. Smart, adaptable, and lethal, if need arise. She was quick on her feet, well trained, and functionally fearless. Azazel thought she was prepared for anything hell could throw at her.

The second objective was something she knew she would enjoy working on. Through the years Azazel was always fascinated by the concept of sin and general demonology. When they announced the mission, she was the first to volunteer. With her certifications? She was _perfect_ for the task.

Azazel didn’t expect to come across a human in hell. Let alone A human with a small gang of demons. ‘ _What an opportunity!_ ’ she thought. ‘ _The ability to observe demons up close will be a valuable asset!_ ’ These demons were relatively agreeable and pleasant to work with, with the exception of Zdrada, who would take every opportunity to blow smoke into her face. By the time the human had kicked open the gates of hell, she had dozens of books worth of notes. 

She was so engrossed in her research that she didn’t think of the consequences of venturing into the overworld. For one, she was essentially grounded. She couldn’t teleport from the overworld. At least not without help, and she didn’t think any of her comrades on the surface would be happy to see her, for she didn’t have permission to be in the exclusion zone. Going back to hell simply wasn’t possible either. The gate they came out of was sealed shut. Not even a group effort of the whole team would be able to crack it open again.

Secondly, her findings and theories in the coming days were so far fetched, so unprecedented, so  _absurd_ , that she was all but certain that they would think she went mad. They would think her a raving fool, mind torn apart by the grasp of hell itself. 

Third, she feared that if she was somehow found in the overworld, her organization would think she had simply deserted. They would strip her of everything, maybe even kill her and send her soul to the void. On top of that, she was essentially... fraternizing with escaped demons. She had slowly come to consider all of them friends, against her better judgment. And the fact that they all lived in the same residence was another kicker to an already harrowing situation.

Azazel, for lack of a better phrase, had a lot going on in her head. She was overwhelmed on many mental fronts and had no way to ease the pressure and anxiety, aside from burying herself in more research. Azazel was no longer functionally fearless like she thought. She was afraid. It took her a while to admit it to herself, but she was terrified of those she was meant to serve. 

The window to her left clicked and made a squeak as it opened. The hushed voice of Malina called out to her.

“Azazel? What are you doing out here?”

“I’m...” she faltered. “I’m just enjoying the night air.”

Malina stuck her head through the opening. “Care if I join you? I saw your halo trough the window and wanted to make sure you were ok.”

“I don’t mind. And I’m alright, really.”

“Are you sure you’re ok?” Malina asked, sounding very unconvinced. She sat on the window sill and leaned back slightly to reach for something in her room. “I didn’t strike you as the type to be up this early.” She said as she leaned back out the window to step onto the roof. It was too dark for azazel to see what she had grabbed.

“I...” Azazel started, then fell silent. She sighed as Malina plopped herself down next to her. “I just can’t sleep is all.”

Malina hummed knowingly. “I know the feeling.” Azazel heard the sound of a glass bottle being unscrewed. She looked over and saw Malina taking a quick swig. Malina looked over at her. “Something tells me there’s a reason you can’t sleep. I may be kind of an antisocial freak sometimes but I’m here to listen if you need to talk, Azazel.”

Azazel sighed again and looked out into the night sky. “I’m slowly realizing that it’s unlikely that I’ll be welcomed back to heaven, even if I could find a way up there. My findings are almost unbelievable. They’d think I’ve lost it.” She paused and took a breath. “On top of that I’ve become close friends with a lot of you, and being social with demons is extremely taboo. I was just supposed to watch from afar, not integrate myself with you all! I was so absorbed by my research and my need to go deeper that I’ve ended up as almost one of the pack. My notes and research are so in depth that it is extremely obvious that I’ve become one with the group. It’s also obvious in the notes that I live under the same roof as you all, both from the context I’ve provided, and the fact that I’ve written more on demons in just a few weeks than my entire organization since the discovery of hell itself. And proximity is something that could get me stripped of everything and I’d be shunned by my people.”

“Gods.”

“Yeah! Yeah. And if I can’t find my way back and they find me down here? Even if I wasn’t with demons? They’d think I’d deserted. Traveling to the overworld is forbidden without explicit and unanimous council approval. They’d court martial me. They’d kill me.”

“Mm.” Malina hummed. She wordlessly offered Azazel the bottle she was drinking from.

“Oh I can’t drink that. That’s a sin.” Azazel said apologetically.

“You’re already sinning right now, talking to me.”

“Oh gods. I guess you’re right.”

“I’m not gonna pressure you into it any further but I’ll share if you want some.”

Azazel gave it a few seconds of thought.

I’m screwed anyway so what’s this going to do.

Azazel looked up at the sky for a moment. “I’ll try it I guess. What is it?”

“Just vodka. You might want to avoid breathing the vapors. You might gag.”

“Mmkay.” Azazel said as she took the open bottle from Malina. 

“Probably plug your nose.” Malina suggested. 

Azazel complied, pinching her nose with a finger and thumb. She brought the bottle to her lips and took a long drag. She thought it tasted like... really angry and bitter water. She quickly swallowed, hoping to get rid of the tingling sensation that she was starting to feel on her tongue. She coughed almost instantly after she opened her airway. Her face scrunched up as she shook her head and handed the bottle back to Malina. “Ugh. That was disgusting.”

Malina laughed softly. “You get used to it after a while.” She took another swig as Azazel watched her. “You really went for it there, huh?”

“I guess.” Azazel felt a strange warmth in the back of her throat. It was almost pleasant. A few moments of silence passed between them.

Malina spoke up. “You know when I started trying to get you to talk about your feelings, I didn’t expect something this heavy, to be honest.”

“I... what _did_ you expect?” Azazel inquired.

Malina chuckled. “I thought you were just gonna come out as gay.”

“What?”

“Like. I thought you were going to tell me that you liked girls.”

“Oh I don’t-“ Azazel abruptly fell silent. “I don’t-“ she started again. Malina could see the gears furiously churning and grinding against each other in her head. Malina had a feeling that she may have crossed a line with that comment.

Azazels mind was suddenly shattered. She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t even know what to think. The fact that she couldn’t consciously say that she _wasn’t_ gay alarmed her. It felt wrong to rule out the possibility, but it also felt more wrong to acknowledge the idea as well. She knew that she probably had another, more serious reason for her people to hurt her, and that terrified her even more than everything else.

Malina’s voice yanked her back to reality. “Azazel?” Azazel turned her head to look at Malina. Malina could see the light from her halo reflecting off the tears beginning to roll down the angels cheeks. Malina repositioned herself closer to Azazel, placed the bottle between her thighs, and gently wrapped her arms around her. Azazel went to return the embrace, hesitated for a moment, then continued. Azazel began quietly sobbing into Malina’s shoulder, unable to form words.

“It’s ok. We’ll figure it out later.” Malina whispered, making an attempt to calm the weeping angel. “We won’t let them take you, even if they do find you. You’re safe with us.”

Azazel continued to cry for a few minutes, holding tight to Malina while the demon gently rubbed her back. Eventually her shaking stopped, and she pulled away from Malina. Her eyes were still watering, but she felt confident that she could speak without falling apart again. She sniffled and looked at Malina.

“Feeling any better?” Malina asked.

“I’m sorry I got your shirt wet.” Azazel sniffled again.

“You’re worried about that? Azazel it’s fine, I have more inside. I can just change.” Malina dismissed her concern with a wave of her hand. Their eyes met again. “I’ll be right back. Hold this.” She handed Azazel the bottle and pushed herself to her feet.

Azazel stared at the bottle in her hands as she listened to Malina walk up the incline. She was thinking about taking another drink, then she felt a lump of soft fabric hit the back of her neck. She whipped her head around to see Malina’s bare back disappearing through the window. She picked up what was probably Malina’s shirt and set it in her lap.

“You can use that to clean yourself up if you’d like.” Malina called to her.

Azazel used the already damp shirt to dry her face as much as she could. She had to admit, even though a new problem had revealed itself, she felt better now that she had the chance to cry it all out. She also felt extremely thankful that she had friends to rely on, especially now that her circumstances were becoming almost impossible to navigate on her own. Hell, she was happy that she even had friends at all. Heaven wasn’t very ‘friendly.’ She had some acquaintances up there, but nothing close to the emotional connection she felt with these demons. She actually felt loved and appreciated. She felt like more than just a cog in a military machine. She felt... at home.

“How do you feel?” Malina asked, slowly and carefully coming back down to her.

“A lot better than before. I’m still petrified by the future but...” Azazel trailed off.

“But...?” Malina sat back down next to her, now wearing a different shirt. She reached over and grabbed the bottle and old shirt from Azazel.

“But I’m glad I have a place to call home. I’m glad that I can count on my friends.”

“We are all here for you. A few of us, including me, have a hard time showing it but we really do appreciate you.”

“Thank you. Especially for letting me cry my eyes out on your shoulder.”

“Any time.”

“I may have to hold you to that.”

Malina snorted. “Sun’s gonna come up soon. You should probably try to sleep so you don’t miss breakfast entirely. Chocolate pancakes.”

Malina was right. Azazel realized that the eastern sky was starting to lighten as the sunlight bounced off the highest reaches of the atmosphere, creating an almost invisible blue haze on the horizon. Malina stood up, tucked her belongings under her arm, and offered a hand to Azazel, which she took. She pulled the angel to her feet.

“Good night, Malina.” Azazel said.

“Good morning.” Malina corrected her with a smirk.

Azazel giggled. “You’re not wrong, I guess.” They shared a look, then both went their separate ways, back to their respective windows.

“Sleep tight” Azazel heard Malina say, shortly followed by a light thump as her window closed.

Azazel smiled and climbed through the opening, shut the window and blinds, and threw herself into bed. She closed her eyes for a second and curled up under the covers. Minutes later, she was actually starting to drift off to sleep, which was very much contrary to her expectations. Shapeless and peaceful dreams slowly filled her mind as she lost consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was just gonna make this a fluffy ass fic but.... I’m nothing if not dramatic. This might get bigger than I intended at first but that’s ok. We’ll see where it goes :D
> 
> Anyway azazel knows she’s definitely not straight now and she’s gonna have to struggle with that lovely Pandora’s box being cut open like a tin can being opened with an axe.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic since I was 11 be nice to me. I’m trying my best. Anyway I just think the two nerds of the group should kiss


End file.
